{Photo from Martha Stewart - don't you love this look?}
Simple rituals that are sure to leave you brimming with bliss.
Sometimes happiness lands in our lap: a surprise half-day at work, an out-of-the-blue e-mail from an old friend, a breathtaking sunset. Other times, it's tougher to grab hold of, say, on a rainy Monday morning when you've forgotten your umbrella. That's why we could all use a few foolproof standbys—go-to tactics guaranteed to lift flagging spirits. "Especially when the world is so uncertain, having a few rituals of your own can bring a sense of control and calm," says Karen Salmansohn, author of How to Be Happy, Dammit (Celestial Arts).
So find a serene spot, pull out a pen and list your never-fail pleasures, no matter how goofy or self-indulgent they seem. In case you need inspiration, we've asked busy women from all walks of life to share their own feel-good secrets. Go ahead and steal them. Just don't blame us if you get hooked. These are habits you definitely won't want to kick!
Photograph Something Every Day
"Four years ago, I started carting my camera everywhere and taking one photo a day. Sure, I have a lot of pictures of flowers or strangers in the laundry room of my apartment building, but I also have snapshots of my sister's baby, friends' weddings, sailing in St. Vincent and people who have come in and out of my life that I would have forgotten if I hadn't captured them on film. When I sit down and look through my albums—another ritual in and of itself—I realize that even though I complain about my life at times, there are many reasons to be happy." —Amy Liu, 28, investment banker, New York City
Get Out the Kleenex
"A couple of times a year I watch really sad movies, like When a Man Loves a Woman, by myself. I start crying, then I remember that this isn't my real life and I feel better! It's sort of reverse psychology." —Johanna Longnecker, 28, marketing manager, Boston
Dream On
"For years, I pushed myself to get up early on weekends to do something productive, like go to the gym or clean the bathroom. But I realized that instead of feeling good about what I'd accomplished, I would end up as wrung-out on Saturday nights as I was during the week. Now I let myself sleep in, guilt-free. I work hard; I deserve the downtime." —Tula Karras, 36, SELF editor, Brooklyn, New York
Write a Chain Letter
"After college, six of my best friends and I started a circle letter. The first person on the list writes a letter and sends it to the next person in the chain; she then adds her own letter and a treasure or two, and sends everything to the third, and so on. When it's my turn, I put all my responsibilities on hold, curl up on the couch and sift through the photos, letters and clippings. It's one of my favorite ways to reconnect." —Jennifer Elliott, 28, teacher, Simsbury, Connecticut
Eat Like a Queen
"When I was growing up, my family had a tradition of marking our accomplishments by having the person of the hour eat off a red plate. So when I got engaged, my parents gave my fiancé and me our own red plate. It reminds me how easy it is to make someone feel special. We use it to acknowledge things like finishing our taxes or getting a raise. When our puppy graduated from obedience school, he even got to eat off the red plate!" —Taylor Ware, 28, social worker, Ithaca, New York
Enjoy a Creative Moment
"When I was in Venice, I bought a leather journal that I now carry with me everywhere. When I need an escape or just want to record a beautiful scene, I fill the pages with words or drawings. I love looking back and reflecting on what I've seen and heard. It keeps me linked to places I care about." —Sarah Drake, 28, architect, Newport, Rhode Island
Kiss Off a Bad Day
"Ever since I gave my husband a perfunctory smooch after I'd had an especially dismal day, he and I made a rule that we must give each other an intense, long kiss when we get home from work—no matter what. Let's just say that my lackluster greeting did not garner rave reviews and an upgrade was demanded. From then on, our hellos have been hot and heavy. The point is to help us remember that we're with someone we love and the rest of the world is unimportant. Plus, it's a great thing to look forward to." —Angela Hayes, 29, publicist, New York City
Bring Your Holiday Home with You
"Every time my husband and I return from vacation, we make a point of skipping the lousy airplane food and going directly to one of our favorite neighborhood restaurants. That way, we get to ignore the empty refrigerator and the huge stack of newspapers and mail just a little bit longer. Somehow, one last romantic dinner together makes it a little less painful to return to the frantic rhythm of our normal lives." —Alexandra Stoddard, 63, New York City, author of Choosing Happiness (HarperCollins)
Do Something Girly
"Getting my nails done always turns my bad moods around. I usually manage to visit the salon once a week, which makes me feel in control of my otherwise hectic life. The flip side is that if my nails look scraggly, I know I need to slow down." —Meg D'Incecco, 35, publicist, New York City
Connect with Your Crew
"The spring after my father died, I felt the need to strengthen my bonds with friends. So I organized a Women I Love lunch as a way to boost my spirits. I invited all my friends over, we ate takeout, and one by one, I stood behind each woman and explained why I loved her. At the end of the afternoon, my friends all said, 'You have to do this next year!' and an annual tradition was born." —Meg Cox, 51, Princeton, New Jersey, author of The Book of New Family Traditions (Running Press)
Take the Plunge
"I live close to the ocean, so when I return home from work in the evenings, I like to walk by the beach, regardless of the season. If the temperature allows, I take a swim and ride some waves. When no one's around, I may even skinny-dip. Being in the surf always makes the world melt away." —Nina Thayer, 50, registered nurse, West Tisbury, Massachusetts
Make a Date to Get Down
"My fiancé and I have a standing appointment to have sex every Sunday. It doesn't matter how many times we've done it—or not—during the week; Sunday is guaranteed sex, no excuses allowed. While it may seem completely unromantic to schedule intimacy, our plan is actually exciting: We spend the week looking forward to Sunday. Plus, knowing that we won't turn into a couple that never has sex makes me feel good." —Kristen Kemp, 30, writing teacher, New York City
Rock Out
"Whenever I need a lift, I get in the car, turn up my radio and sing at the top of my lungs. I may look foolish to the people in the next lane, but I'll never see them again, so who cares?" —Tracy Mlakar, 29, communications manager, Playa del Rey, California
Be Hallmark Happy
"I love browsing in stationery stores. Typically, I'll buy 10 or 15 funny cards all at once, stamp them, then toss them in my purse. That way, when I have a minute here or there—standing in line, waiting at the doctor—I'll write a 'thinking of you' note to a friend and send it off. It gives me a good feeling knowing that they'll have a pleasant surprise waiting for them in their mailbox." —Nidhi Pardue, 28, entrepreneur, Cary, North Carolina
Feel Famous
"Every so often, I go to the Pierre hotel in New York City, sit in the rotunda—this sumptuous, ornate, oval room with a sweeping spiral staircase and a mural on the ceiling—and order a martini. I always bring a book and read. I like to imagine I'm living in a movie." —Jessica Maria Tuccelli, 34, actress and writer, New York City
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